Ignoring the overload of the word 'time' in that post...
I'm going to be taking a short break this week, starting today and going through next Monday. I'll be back on Tuesday the 25th. I just need some extra time to get things together, since I'm going back to Texas over the weekend, which means I'm forfeiting my usual Saturday dance of remembering how to function, the one where I do adult things like purchasing vegetables and doing laundry and cleaning my floor. Which means I have to somehow fit those in during the week, right as I'm also starting my SAGES (there's an essay due EVERY WEEK, I'm just going to go die now...well, maybe not die, but sob in terror...) Anyways, all that aside, practically, this means this is all you'll be seeing of me until the 25th, when you'll get another music-y post and the day after should see some Texas. (Like, I will do my best to make it as Texas as possible, minus the cowboy boots because I'm only taking a carry-on and I'm not willing to lose the space since I intend to bring things back too!)
I'll warn you for next week that though I spent a significant amount of this week's evenings socializing, I was really lazy and tired and so there won't be many outfits. Can't say that I personally mind it, though, I've really enjoyed this week, as well as the things I've found.
So I've never really developed an addiction to a TV series of any sort before, but the people I've been hanging out with have gotten me into Battlestar Galactica. Can I just say that I absolutely love all the ladies in this? They're all fantastic (although the blonde chick in the sexy dresses confuses me...but that's kind of what her plot purpose seems to be too, so far?) I think Lieutenant Starbuck is definitely my favorite though. Have any of you ever watched this series?
So this video might be making me have conflicted emotions about whether I want to spend any excess money I make this summer that doesn't go for food/savings on shoes, books, or well, these. I'd protest my adulthood, but it's obvious that I kind of lack in that department.
I think it's obvious that I love fashion (especially shoes...if you feel like trawling through my archives (ie you are way less lazy than me, I dunno where the picture is of it) you can see what my collection looked like a few years ago, before I had a lot of the ones I have now. (And don't think that means I don't have some of the ones I used to...I do, it's bad). However, there's something I love much, much, much more than either of these things: books. I've been a reader for a long time, madly in love with fantastic worlds where badass ladies saved the asses of everyone in the world/their country/that they know. I haven't had much time for reading in a long time, between classes and the time-suck of tumblr (which I'm still contemplating in confusion... I don't want to really be on tumblr anymore, even though I love all the things I see on it, even though I love a lot of the people I follow, and it's a very weird feeling, because I'm also just plain not interested in the way it eats my time). It's also not easy managing a blog plus all these things - though it was certainly much easier when I wasn't trying to update five days a week and was okay with making lame excuses about it. Apparently my work ethic's improved with age, which means I have like six years before I turn into my workaholic mom. ...maybe five. Hopefully I'll do a bit better of a balance by actually having a personal life, but in the meantime, yes, the blog eats a lot of time. Surprisingly, despite currently working a 8-hour (7.5 hours officially, somehow, I guess half of lunch and our break don't count? I'd make sense of it but I'm not interested in doing math right now) job, I have a lot more free time than I did during the year. Maybe because my job ends when I leave work, but being a student doesn't end when you leave class. It's been a lot easier this summer, and it's meant I've finally had time to read again, and today I'd like to introduce you to one of my favorite authors (seriously, authors, because I can't pick just one series, though I am a bit partial to Tortall over Emelan).
Tamora Pierce is about six months younger than my mom, and writes some of my favorite series EVER. I first discovered her during fifth grade, when my teacher used to let me read during math class rather than try to force me to pay attention (a futile exercise). At that age, I was a self-proclaimed tomboy hiding my love of dresses, skirts, and excessively skimpy shorts from everyone, including myself, behind a preference for the color black, and short and extremely tangled mouse-colored hair that I refused to brush or use shampoo on. I started with Alanna: The First Adventure, which is the introduction to a world that now spans about eighteen books (more coming soon, yay!). She has another world, which spans ten books (and another one out SOON I'm excited and dreading it because it will actually be The Full Sads but I do know the gist of what happens because it doubles back to explain some things in the most recent two books), but that is the Emelan world and the Tortall world is the one I love most. Not that being a stitch witch like Sandrilene fa Toren would be bad at all...it'd definitely be pretty badass.
Basically, Tamora Pierce is a badass lady who writes books about other badass ladies (with dudes around, yes, but she understands that most books don't show the girl grabbing a sword and slaying the monsters and being ready to give up her life because it's her DUTY, not out of some selfless magic courage or whatever, but because she's sworn an oath to protect her country and intends to fulfill it...and by the way, if it's not obvious already, Pottermore told me I'm a Gryffindor, so go ahead and ignore any rambling about how badass all these characters are...)
Pierce has three quartets, one duet, and one trilogy out for her Tortall series. The Song of the Lioness quartet is first, about Alanna of Trebond, a girl whose goal is to be the first knight in a century. The second quartet, The Immortals, is a while after that, and features Veralidaine Sarrasri, from the country of Galla, one of Tortall's neighbors, whose mother and grandfather just died, who is hiding some pretty amazing magic. And then we get to my favorite quartet, which I'm re-reading right now, actually: Protector of the Small. This is something like maybe elevenish years after the first quartet? It's the first girl in a few centuries to OPENLY go for her knighthood. IE no disguises like Alanna, she's a girl and she wears dresses to dinner, because the boys surly about a girl fighting alongside them just have to deal with it. Keladry of Mindelan is absolutely spectacular, and I also really love that while the books build towards the final book, the real thread of the plot (and you know, that whole "main villain" stuff) isn't introduced until the very end of the third book. It's such wonderful reading, and I'd love to be Kel, bratty griffin and angry men with their panties in a bunch because omg girls with weapons regardless. The one after that is the duet, alternately called Trickster's Duet or The Daughter of the Lioness (considering it's about Aly stepping out from her mom's shadow...I prefer the former). Her mom is Alanna, yes, and well, she kind of winds up in slavery and befriending a god and things only get more interesting from there. She's very different from the other women Pierce has written, being much more behind-the-scenes of things, and it's a very interesting read. The final set, thus far, the trilogy called Provost's Dog, takes place a cool three-hundred years pre-Alanna, when women were still normally fighting and stuff. It's about a policewoman (a Dog, as they're called at the time) and her adventures in service to the Crown. It's a change - first-person journal writing, the books are separate plots from one another, and well, there's also an old friend or three from Alanna's series that are there (you'll see, should you read them).
And now I will shut up, but if you're looking for some fantasy to read...I totally suggest these. Because I'm 100% biased to love them, yes, shut up, but also because they're fantastically written with wonderfully human heroines and amazingly interesting characters, who are fully human no matter how small they are. Seriously.
(Also if people are interested I might just do some rambling over the next few weeks showcasing all my favorite authors...spoil myself as I'm going nuts over being free to read again, yanno!)
I know I've done a similar sounding post before, but I think this is different enough to justify doing. A while ago, I stumbled on this campaign, and it got me thinking. Watch the video, and tell me what you think.
If I weren't afraid, I wouldn't worry about the way certain parts of my body look in different cuts of skirts or shirts. If I weren't afraid, I would just confront the person who's been mucking with all my emotions for months now (unintentionally, but STILL). If I weren't afraid, there are a lot of things I'd talk about much more openly on this blog. If I weren't afraid, I'd raise hell every time I get catcalled while just friggin' walking to Chipotle, every time I get harassed on the RTA. If I weren't afraid, I would always ask people to hang out with me when I get lonely.
I write a lot of my posts in advance these days, just to make life easier, and I feel compelled to state that there's not gonna be much text right here because I'm actually 3000000000% too lazy to write anything, and I've spent all day sleeping because I had nobody to do anything with, and that did not translate into productivity, unfortunately.
Today's post inspired by the many people who don't know me who frequently question the fact that I dress "up" nearly every day (apparently skirts and dresses aren't casual?) Occasionally, I even get this question from people I know fairly well. I especially get this question from guys, who can't seem to comprehend the fact that a) I like wearing these clothes and b) there is absolutely no reason for me wearing them other than that simple fact. It's actually really annoying to hear this question on multiple occasions from the same exact people, but I just kind of deal with it at this point. Anyone else have this happen to them?
Anyways. One of my highlights this past week was when I forgot my hair ties at home, I was actually able to use BOBBY PINS to make my hair stay up and off my neck. It's actually finally long enough for that!
Anyhow, back to last week...
So Monday was just kind of an "enh" day, but I wound up deciding that my goal for the week was to wear two skirts I don't wear as much, and my boss told me she'd selected me to go on this Housing and Residence Life staff retreat, which was pretty cool.
Shirt/shoes - thrifted | Skirt - F21 | Scarf/belt - Meadows Museum (at SMU in Dallas)
Tuesday was another "enh" day, though I did drag myself to Southside for a barbecue that the RSA's were putting on for the start of summer, and got to sort of hang out with people (till they went off to scale the roof of one of the buildings... I actually never did find out how that went...)
Wednesday and Thursday were 'grouchy, lie in bed and feel extremely bored and tired and not quite care' sort of days, basically I worked and came home and did blog things and went to bed, though I did get ice cream with a friend on Thursday (and froze...but let's not go there). Friday, I hung out with people and watched some Battlestar Galactica (damn them for getting me interested in watching it...) Also talked a lot until like four am despite intending to leave and go to bed at around one am... (Also this picture was taken at four am, go me... Can you tell how exhausted I am?)
Finally, Saturday I literally just slept all day, other than getting food at about six pm (after which I went back to bed) and a brief spurt of consciousness from eleven pm till two am. It's sad, as I'd intended to go to the Cleveland Flea Market, but I suppose it's better for my wallet that I didn't. Next month? And then Sunday I didn't really do anything. (Okay, full disclosure I'm writing this Sunday at like four pm, maybe I'll get in some human interaction later?)
This has been quite the week. Lots of work. Some actual socialization happened on Wednesday, and I recently spoke to my parents for the first time in quite a while. I'm hoping that I'll be able to go to a museum with some friends this weekend, as well as (hopefully) play more ridiculous board/card games with people, and maybe get some sort of DIY thing I've been procrastinating for months out of the way...maybe. Oh, and I've finally listened to Gangam Style enough that I can properly pronounce a little over half of the words. Be proud of me. Anyways, some of the things I've loved this week...
This article really interested me, because it's something I've tried to do in my life, and something that I've seen a lot of people, well, avoid doing, which puzzled me when I was younger (and admittedly still puzzles me now, even though I'm much more shy than I was as a small child (yay for becoming more awkward?)). I've never enjoyed the way our culture seems to think that one person's happiness somehow damages another person's happiness. It doesn't seem remotely logical to me, yet it traps us in these loops where we never feel good enough because "so-and-so's doing better than me". What does 'better' even mean!?!? Bigger house, more organized place, bigger boobs, kids doing better in school, not divorced, making more money or just WHAT? Are you sure that whatever they're doing "better" than you is actually any better in any way, shape, or form? We can never really live another person's life and understand them, because we're equipped with only our own life experiences and the way that shapes our understanding of everything we will ever learn. As far as I understand it, there is no magical "better", because if we can't care about ourselves and love ourselves regardless of what other people are doing when we're single (which is NOT a bad thing, even though a lot of people seem to think it is) and poor and our lives don't feel together, then we're not going to be able to care about ourselves and love ourselves if we magically have the most perfect spouse in the world and are the richest people in the world and everything runs perfectly. You are yourself, and you can change your habits and you can change your personality with work and change your appearance and change your mindset, but you don't have control over anyone else and how the world interacts with you over how it interacts with them. All you can do is inspect yourself (without thinking that you should be Beyoncé or that the word 'perfect' actually has any reasonable meaning) and decide to either change yourself or accept yourself and do as much as you possibly can. We're all bodies going to die and fall apart, little electrical signals make us move and do every thing we see as beautiful - we're made from the same components, and everything about the way our society functions is completely arbitrary. If you befriend a talented person and someone's idiot enough to think that somehow makes you lesser, what does it matter? In 100 years, they'll be dead and you will have been happy while you were alive to feel it. I hope this rant makes more sense to y'all than it does to me when I'm reading over it again...
I've finally begun to develop an interest in pretty bedding (apparently I'm old enough to think it's a good thing, but not old enough to care to the extent of actually buying all the stuff to actually make my bed look pretty...) Still, I'm in love with this new Lauren Conrad bedding stuff. It's all so pretty, and I particularly enjoy this pattern/color scheme. Pretty and colorful...it's nice.
I've been trying to figure out something that'll make my walls a little classier (considering that 3/4s of the art I've got up is, well, fanart of characters from a webcomic, you might understand why - I enjoy it, but it'd be cool to make it look fancier). This cute idea just involves washi tape and looks like no effort. Now all I have to do is decide if I want to use my washi tape for it, or continue hoarding it and crooning about how pretty it is...
This is...basically how I live my life. Yeah. It seems to work pretty well, though, so I think I'll keep at it!
It's not a secret that I can be awful at words (okay, maybe on here it is... Maybe...) I am absolutely awful at speaking - I forget words when I'm trying to say them, accidentally say the wrong word (telling people good night instead of hello is an unfortunately regular occurrence, and I don't know why), and frequently am just incapable of making a single sentence sound right and grammatically correct. I don't have the same sort of problems while writing, at least (and these issues tend to be less problematic after about noon, so maybe my brain just finally gets itself together around then, who knows). Still, even in writing, one thing that I am terrible with is the expression of my own emotions. One of the boys on my floor, earlier this year, demanded to know if I was capable of emotions other than apathetic irritation or hysterical laughter or tears (which basically turn into the same thing, for me), which are apparently the only emotions he's ever seen me display. It's not a half-bad question, considering that I tend to be fairly toneless when speaking, am generally only cautiously interested in things (not full-on wild enthusiasm for really anything), and don't generally speak too much. Honestly, my parents have asked similar questions, and that conversation even sparked one of my New Years Resolutions - being more open about emotions (among other things). Years of being so inexpressive mean that I don't really know how to do that, because I automatically cut in to control myself when I'm about to burst out with a feeling. It's a lot easier to express emotions through mediums other than your physical body - art and writing are particularly popular mediums for emotions (poetry especially). I'm not a poet (okay, confession, I wrote three pieces a while ago and still need to bug my poet friend to help me understand how to poetry because I have NO idea and I'm not actually sure they're poetry) or much of an artist, but I do love seeing other people's work - one of the greatest beauties of art is how your perception of it changes simply because of your background.
I love art that blends words and imagery, especially like this one does.
this is everywhere I don't know who made it! D:
I went to Cleveland MOCA (Museum of Contemporary Art) a while ago and saw a wonderful piece they had commissioned Kate Gilmore for. Kate Gilmore involves her body as a piece of her art - it's kind of performance art, actually - her body creates the art, but the way she utilizes it to do so is also part of the art. It's really interesting (and okay, it's also really therapeutic to watch someone smashing thousands of vases...like, the video accompanying the piece is the most soothing thing I've ever watched). Naturally, I took a snap of the work.
I like lots of other types of art as well - portraits are some of my absolute favorite things! - but these are two of my current favorites that have really made me go through emotions. What sorts of art do you like, and how does that relate to your emotions?
Despite what my outfit posts would make you think, I really love button-downs. I'm just a bit too busty to manage to be able to find many that fit my body well. (Just try looking professional when the only options are "buttons about to pop off" and "I'm pretty sure you're about to drown in that" - it doesn't work very well). Still, I've recently managed to find a few things that don't either drown my midget body or strain at my disproportionate chest (and I've avoided the ones that manage to do both, hurrah!) The secret seems to be sleevelessness - maybe that makes it pull less at the chest, maybe it's just because the roomy ones are easier to layer with things that bring them in a bit, who knows. Whatever the reason these ones seem to be better geared towards my shape, the fact is that I really want more of them. Like, maybe a whole box filled with them. Totally reasonable, right? (Not reasonable, really, but understandable (hopefully), considering how difficult getting the right styles for my shape can be...) Here are some of my top picks right now, don't mind the drool...
How do you find most of the music you listen to? I know a lot of people specifically follow various bands and musicians, and a lot of people find music based off the recommendation of friends, or off 'related songs' on Pandora and Spotify and YouTube, or via the radio. Personally, I don't really follow bands or musicians very avidly (or any celebrities really...) I get some music based off other people's recommendations on occasion, have found lots of things because they were free on iTunes (hooray for being broke!) or heard them on the radio somewhere while I was out. A surprising amount of my music, though, comes from things I've heard at concerts or performed/seen performed in various musicals. (Okay, it's not surprising at all, considering all the years of acting and choir, but still...) Other than that, there's not much rhyme or reason to the things on my iTunes (or much organization either, shhh). There's everything from Pitbull to fancy orchestral pieces to country to pop to whatever the hell Taylor Swift even is (is she country? pop? a fusion? we just don't know, but I do want all her clothes) to "things that were popular among preteens back in 2005 that were all I was allowed to listen to until shortly before this blog was made and I was deemed sufficiently adult to listen to things other than Hillary Duff" to showtunes to anime music (the third-most-played song I've got is a Puella Magi song, so) to K-Pop and J-Pop and Spanish music, some random stuff in German... Is anyone else this ridiculously non-cohesive in what they listen to?
Anyways, my songs today are pieces I've seen performed. One is a song a girls acapella group at my university performed (they're such a cool group!) and the other is from the musical The Last Five Years, which I highly recommend, even though it will take your heart and carve it into an elaborate masterpiece before beating it flat and then dicing it up and lighting it on fire. Seriously, you've got a 67% chance of starting to cry at the opening song.
I would like to preface the beginning of this post with my incredibly deep apologies for the selfies you will encounter within it. I began work with the impression I shouldn't bring anything with me to do during breaks other than my planner and a pen so that I could try to, well, plan. Unfortunately, that occupies me for like five minutes. My savior, these past few weeks, has been my camera and a constant barrage of increasingly weird selfies. I mentioned them in my recent I Can't Believe post, and well, they're below, for your viewing pleasure/judging of my sanity, and will be followed by clothes to make up for scarring you with my weird faces.
I like Dr. Pepper?
So, past that showcase of what I do on break... Monday, I wound up watching The Bachelorette with my suitemates. Kind of a weird show, honestly quite a few creepy people, but it was entertaining enough, I guess. I think I might wind up watching it with them again this Monday (aka today) if only for the social interaction, since I've noticed I get pretty starved for that during the week.
Tuesday was a dull day, though I did begin to work out that day, which is one of my summer goals, and I walked to Little Italy to buy things. Wednesday, I was so disgusted by the cleaning I had to do (someone had "alone time" in a music room I had to clean, and well, that should NEVER happen around a piano EVER) that the only way to feel better for the rest of the day was a shower and dressing nicely. Luckily, I'm a simple enough person that dressing nicely can actually usually make me happy.
Thursday was a good day, other than cleaning bathrooms (it's pretty disgusting to do that, guys) and managing to get my arm kind of...burned by chemicals, which I managed to not notice that I'd done for the next like three days. Apparently the only sort of pain I don't have an abnormally high tolerance for is itching... Anyways. I read poetry and finally fixed my Great-Great-Aunt Elizabeth's old necklace. She gave it to me shortly before she died when I was about fourteenish, and through poor handling, I managed to not only have pieces come apart from one another, but all but one of these delicate hollow beads (they're not glass but not plastic so I dunno what they are) broke on it. I spent several hours with my jewelry pliers and determination, tightening all the loose wires and restringing the pattern as well as I could. I had a few screw-ups, but overall I'm pretty proud of it! Friday, post-work, I went to hang out with my friends Nick and Kelly at a bar in Coventry, because Kelly wanted to watch a baseball game. Well, that wound up cancelled (and Nick and I actually had to walk all the way to Coventry, which is not fun when you're exhausted from work) but we had fun just eating and talking, so it was great! (Plus Kelly drove us back, which was really nice!)
Saturday, I had to take buses like everywhere. I returned some things I'd thought I'd need for my job, bought some new things, and got back on campus just in time to meet up with Nick and Kelly to go on my first visit to the West Side Market in Ohio City, an area of Cleveland. It was really fun, and I ate a bunch of good food (and bought some good food for later). We also went on a Target/Whole Foods adventure, where I finished the rest of my grocery shopping. Nick and I hung out again later and we wound up playing this game called Things until about 3:00AM at Theta Chi, because we went to pester my friend Denise who is living there over the summer. It was a pretty fun day, definitely! (Fun fact, this dress normally is just a low back, but I flipped the back to the front by accident and wound up liking it, though it is preeeetty lowcut when you do that).
Shirt-vest-thing/dress/shoes/hairthing/necklace (which you can barely see) - F21
Sunday, I pretty much just did laundry and worked on blogging things, other than one jaunt out to Chipotle.
Shirt - H&M | Skirt - F21 | Shoes - Payless | Bracelet - gift | Ring - someplace?